I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
