he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
