put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
My dick has a subreddit
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
