she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
