I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I need a burrito and a hug.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize