I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
