I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
