Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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