Umm I'm too high to move.
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Randomize