An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
how does that bad decision feel?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
