i barfeds in our rink
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
