Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
