420 ftw
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
