Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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