He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
