wakey wakey hands off snakey
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
