do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
