I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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