she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Randomize
