My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
