I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
