it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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