omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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