i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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