we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
false alarm. still invincible.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize