I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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