forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
