Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
