I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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