Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
