I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
