Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
