so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
