only if we run a train.
done.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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