And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize
