if i died would you start the facebook group?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
