why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Randomize
