good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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