Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
