Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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