Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize