try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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