Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Randomize
