You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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