Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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