she was so not down for the gang bang
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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