So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
