It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
