Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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