whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize