im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize